The previous entry was not enough to make me feel unbitchy before I slip into Potterland... or sleep. Whichever comes first. In an especially booky mindset because The Original Three were hanging out today and we always slip into Happy CharacterLand for at least a bit and it makes me happy in my soul.

Anyway Molly and I made this the other day and my favorite part about it is it's a conversation. Imagine a lot of giggling and anecdotes inbetween, and all of it overlaps, tripping over one another in a hurry to get out and enjoy the sun. Try and guess who said what, I dare you.

I love us. All of us.

Mollface and Brat's List of Things Guys Should Know But Generally Don't

-It's okay to be awkward! ...but to an extent. Being awkward at life is NOT cool.
-Sometimes you just have to have balls.
-Not all girls are girly.
-You are just as complicated and inexplicable to us as we are to you.
-Not all girls play games... usually we mean what we say. On that note, you should say what you mean. There is nothing worse than trying to guess what your partner is thinking.
-You have to be able to laugh at yourself. But not at her. Okay, sometimes at her. But let her laugh too.
-How you smell is SO IMPORTANT... pheromones are not a myth.
-Laughing at her jokes is as important as getting her to laugh at yours.
-Pretty much all girls love flowers. That is not a myth either.
-Expensive gifts are not everything. It's the littlest things that speak volumes.
-WE NEED SPACE
-When we say that nothing is wrong, we're generally lying. But it still doesn't mean we want to tell you.
-Excessive pride is not just a guy thing.
-Neither is inexplicable loyalty.
-Playing with a girl's hair is always a plus. Always. Also holding hands. There's just something basic and sweet about it. Plus it's relaxing.
-Oh, and backrubs!
-If a girl clearly feels awkward, please don't make her feel stupid on top of it. And don't make it worse with your own awkwardness. We beg of you.
-If we're afflicted with word vomit, just kiss us. It works on so many levels.
-Compliments are good, but not excessively. Then it's just annoying, not to mention embarrassing.
-Respect her interests. You don't have to like them or get involved in them, but show a little respect and support. Ex: Your beloved is a theatre major. Go to a show. Or at least send flowers.
-White lies are appreciated sometimes. The answer is never "Why yes, I think you're getting a little pudgy around the middle there..."
-But honesty is the most important thing. Don't just be moody, it's just as frustrating for us as it is for you when we do it.
-TACT. Is SO important. You don't have to lie, but gentle phrasing is appreciated.
-Creativity... it's what we remember. Even just "movie moments." They go down in the books.
-Talking about your ex girlfriend... means you're open and that's good. Talking about her excessively... well you can see where that leads. Don't be stupid.
-Just... don't be stupid. In general.
-Think about your actions before you do them. Girls overanalyze things to painful detail... a finger twitch could mean a marriage proposal. Or that you hate her with a fiery burning passion you didn't know you had.
-Accept the fact that her girlfriends know everything. They just do. Half the things she does were probably their idea. Deal.
-Allow her to have guy friends. My God. Allow her to have guy friends.
-TRUST HER. Don't be a stalker, even if your intentions are as good as gold.
-Respect her boundaries. Make sure she respects yours. Have well-defined boundaries to begin with.
-Make time for your own friends. Nothing is worse than a leech.
-Understand that she is not always thinking of you, and when she is it's probably an inconvenient time for you. Humor her and she'll humor you back.
-Tell her if she's being obsessive. We don't usually notice.
-Really just be open. It really helps. Like really. We're not stupid, but we don't always know the source of the problem. The worst is when we try and fix it and create worse problems than before. Just let us in on the secret.
-She deserves to know when you're not interested. Don't do her any favors. Jackass.
-FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, DON'T CHEAT ON HER. Wrap up your loose ends before you move on. You'd think it was obvious...
-Make sure you both understand the status of your relationship, as to whether it's exclusive or open or anything in between. That is very important.
-As much as we're all about not being smothered, it's still good to know you're thinking of us. Like once in awhile. Like you're our boyfriend or something.
-WE REALLY NEED SPACE

...contributions are welcome :)
Love,
The Management

I feel better. Now all I need is enough drugs to get me though the week...

ink :: graphite